“I Still Cry”

When you care for so many different people, every day, you tend to get lost.  Lost in them, lost in teaching, lost in your compassion, lost in their words, lost in one stolen moment.  Then, boom, it hits you. It hits you like a ton of bricks that were too heavy for you to hold. Some say it gets easier as the days go by.  Some say that it gets easier when the hands of time are turned back and sprung forward.  You think that you can handle it, because you’ve seen it day in and day out.  Then 1, 2, 3, 4, four types of pain, 4 types of hurt, four types of heartbreak, four types of tears, four types of memories, four types of laughter, four types of smiles, but four different yet equal types of love. When your career is to help people, you get lost in and pulled in to their reality.  You laugh with them, you talk with them, you console them, you cry with them, and then you hug them. You hug them so tight that they get lost in the comfort of knowing that you truly and genuinely care.  Then, in a moment, your career goes from being what you do, to being who you are.  I didn’t pick this career path – this career chose me. I no longer ask myself why, because I saw it in the face of my 4 loved ones that meant the most to me.  I still cry on occasion because I’m still healing, but the blessing is knowing that you got to share in the moments that they needed you the most with memories of smiles, love, and laughter to last a lifetime.

Dedicated to my 4 angels, I Love You